Me! Me me me! ME!

Date: 2019-03-22 02:09 pm (UTC)
beyondwandpoint: (Default)
From the original AO3 Comments: Sat 16 Jun 2018 12:48PM EDT

Let me preface this by saying *you're welcome to laugh*. Hell, you're *encouraged* to laugh. *I* certainly did. And people really should laugh more. It's *healthy*.

So, I've ended up in hospital three times in the last three months (that was less healthy, and just so we're clear, that's *not* the part you're supposed to laugh at yet.. o.O.)(props to me for posting regularly (ish) anyway) and last week we went and did scary!medical stuff, diagnostics, the results were kind of 'dunno?' ¯\_("/)_/¯ It's complicated, but right now it counts as a win, and that was lovely. It really was; trust me on that. (Sometimes you don't realise just how much you've been holding your breath until you feel yourself releasing it.) Unfortunately, in the process of performing their s!ms, while poking me with their stupid needles (simply tapping a vein, really, it was nothing remotely dramatic), they struck a nerve. *Literally*.

I always thought that was a figure of speech. Or maybe whacking your funny bone. But no. It's a thing. *Of course it is*. And *of course* they did. (The 'to me' should go without saying, but just in case that was unclear...)

*Naturally*, it turns out that isn't something that goes away overnight. No, no of course not.

And I kinda want to gnaw my arm off. 'As solutions go, that seems a bit radical...' As solutions go, frankly it's *not*.

And - here's the brilliant bit - the current medical advice is 'don't use your arm'.

 
I *laughed*.

This is the *third time* in about ten months I've had that advice *for three completely different things*. 'Don't use your hands/ arm(s).' Also? What? Only the *one* arm this time? Pfft. Try harder. I swear, they're slipping.

Let's just take a moment and admire the consideration on my part for not forcing my team of dedicated medical professionals to have to come up with anything new for their billable moments. (Still no co-pay for that! W00t!) Or the elegance on their parts for managing to recycle the same advice, whichever. (That's sort of impressive. Or brazen. I haven't decided.) Who knows, maybe they haven't got anything else up their white sleeves but unusable arms. I suppose if I *really* wanted to test that theory, I could always break a leg and see if they're still telling me not to use my arms, but somehow I lack the dedication required to pursue that theory more robustly.

Right about now, obviously, I'm *kicking* myself for not getting on top of the dictation software this winter. Change = evil. (Kicking, fortunately, still works. With some caveats, but still... All the more reason not to go breaking that leg...) (I'm sure there's a lesson in there about procrastination somewhere that I'll put off learning until another day...) I'm now experimenting with it. Software, not leg breaking. It's going sort of meh, rather like I anticipated. Give it time...

And it turns out that when you tie one hand behind your back, typing doesn't just take twice as long, so that's a bit of a bummer.

So, all of this is to say, don't worry if I update a little more slowly for the next couple of weeks. We're back to 'mechanical difficulties', but it's nothing more serious than that, and it's nothing insurmountable. I'll get there. Plod plod plod.

I really am a stunningly tough little cookie, and I have a well developed sense of humour. (Which is good, because I also have some really... challenging luck.) I'd say it builds character, but that's one thing I have in spades anyway...
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